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[May. 21st, 2006|11:31 am] |
I killed a raccoon last night. I hit the brakes. But it was so close. And I'm so sad. What if it was a mommy going to feed the babies.
arg.
=(=(=(=( |
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| hello hello hello |
[Oct. 15th, 2005|06:28 pm] |
Hiya.
I'm in Philly. Wahoo. ANYONE KNOW WHERE THE NEAREST LIQUOR STORE IS?! Because these girls don't know. And they're stupid. Dumb girls.
Val's roomates are interesting. Kinda keeping to themselves. WHATEVAH. But yeah, they're nice I guess. I"M SO BOOOOORED. BOROROEONDOENODONEODOENTOENODNONE.
We have to go search for the store now. yay. then carry it all back. man.
ttyl
<3 RAVEN
lalalallalalalalalalalalalalalallala
luff.
OH YEAH I HAVE A KITTEN i will post pictures osmetime this week okokokokokokokokokokkokoooek goko |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 26th, 2005|04:59 pm] |
Once again I find myself letting everyone know I'm still alive.
I haven't dropped off the face of the Earth, but my computer however has done just that.
I love you all. Really, I do. Especially Kurt. I dare to say he's most certainly one of my favorite people in the world, and, not to get too sappy, in my heart.
Love love love darling. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 1st, 2005|05:07 pm] |
I'm going straight to hell.
Maybe I'll get out on good behavior after a few years. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 28th, 2005|10:05 pm] |
New Hope with Val and Tim and Gina. Tim and Gina's cutesy coupleness made me and Val sick. And envious. But we shopped our jealousy away. haha
I bought lots of records. And a necklace and earrings. And a new little tin box. And pins. Oh, and sunglasses! woot.
I took tons of cool pictures that you might get the pleasure of viewing later on, if my computer decides to let me upload them.
I'm very tired. Haven't slept much this past week. Robbie kept me out til 3AM Thursday night, and this weekend was none stop. But very fun.
Splish splash. I never really have much to say.
G'night. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 22nd, 2005|06:15 pm] |
Everyone's leaving me.
Even Kurt, who I suppose doesn't count.
But still. |
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| My computer's date keeps changing. |
[Aug. 21st, 2005|02:53 pm] |
Happy entry for Tristan.
=)
=) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =)
=) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =)
=) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =)
=) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 20th, 2005|01:05 pm] |
I hate thinking about you, but it's mostly all I can do.
Shadows of the night
Moving on the ground
Like silent clouds
They follow me around
As I wander the dark
Throught the midnight mist
Remembering our last kiss
Do you know how much
You're missed
Tonight I stand in this lonely place
I search the heavens
For some saving grace |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 18th, 2005|12:25 pm] |
I'm tired of being the girl who's only around when he needs me. He doesn't stop by to visit, he doesn't call me on his own, hell- he doesn't even return my calls.
But when he needs me, I'm there. As soon as he's better, he's back out, on the run, no looking back.
I don't want to be that girl. If he can't bother with me, why should I help? Why should I be his shouldar to cry on? Literally. In, out. Gone. I miss him. I don't think that's fair.
You're either going to be here, or you're not. But I'm not going to bend for you. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 16th, 2005|07:52 am] |
Philly was awesome. Granted, walking through the ghetto for miles was a little scary, haha, I had a wonderul time. More about htat later when I have time.
Sorry I didn't call you back last night, Kurt. Mom's birthday. Blah blah.
I'll call you tonight, kid. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 11th, 2005|09:46 pm] |
No date.
Can't do it.
GO FIGURE.
I hate myself for loving you. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 10th, 2005|06:51 pm] |
I have a date tomorrow.
Then I'll be in Philly all weekend.
Which means laundry tonight. Bleh. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 6th, 2005|06:57 pm] |
You're horrible. Honestly. Right to him.
No sorry. No nothing. Just. Him.
And to think of me as your friend. Well. You must not. Because who does that? I know there's two sides to this story, and yeah I'm also to blame for the breakup. But, god. I'm here, too. Feeling worse than him, it seems. But, hey. Maybe because his best friend, and one of mine, are there for him, right? |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 5th, 2005|08:36 pm] |
Guess who the new jr coach is for my sister's cheerleading team.
yeah... |
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| I don't see how you could ever be anything but mine. |
[Jul. 31st, 2005|07:57 pm] |
I hate when you say goodbye for the night. You can't imagine how it feels when you say it for ever.
I have everything in a box. It's not that I want to give it back, I want to take it all out and put it back where it belongs. I want to put my favorite picture of us back in it's frame. I want to put the poem I started a long time ago and never got a chance to finish back in my draw, and finish it one day when I get the chance. I want to put the rose I saved from prom back into the book I was pressing it in. I want to put the picture of you in 7th grade I have back on my wall, and laugh at it adoringly when I see it, like I used to. I want to put the wine glass from prom back on the shelf, I want to put your hoodie back in my closet, and I want to put that damned ring back on my finger. And twist it and play with it and when I'm feeling blue hold it against my heart so I know you'll be there to cheer me up when you get home from work.
I want to take it back out and do that now, and stop my tears and laugh a little, put the tissues away and smile.
But it's over. And there's nothing that stupid ring can do to help me now. It doesn't have superpowers that will make you come back. All it has is a whole lot of memories I can't face right now. It means more to me than anything anyone's ever given me, and to wear it would be a constant reminder of you, and a constant wave of sadness and self pity, and a stomach full of knots. And that won't help me get over you, and that's what I need to do.
So everything's in a box, and I was going to give it all back to you. But I was thinking maybe I should keep it, and hide it away, and take it out and remember us every once in a while. Keep it to remind me who I am and who I was, to remember my rights and my wrongs, help me be a better woman with another man, to remind me of where I belong.
And even my wall is coming down. It doesn't seem right to erase your name, but it's the last thing I want to see before I go to sleep. Because tonight is the only night I'm going to allow myself to cry myself to sleep.
I understand why you're doing this. And I'm not mad at you. I just can't do the friends thing. Not now. It's all so much to handle.
I don't want you to go. But I'm not going to hold you back anymore. Didn't I tell you you'll have a wife who paints? We all know that's not me. It had to happen sometime, right? heh.
I love you. And I will forever. I think deep down, you know that. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 31st, 2005|04:48 am] |
wooh. i got on at home. for the first time in ages.
vacation wasn't good. /story.
I need to let go. It's so bad, I don't know what I'm holding on to. Memories. That's all it is anymore. I'm sorry you hate me. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 13th, 2005|04:59 pm] |
ok so the intraweb is out in the trailer. so i stopped by the office to check my email.
anyway. in short.
im not dead. its just that lately all computers hate me.
I had a lot of fun at 6 flags. Everyone was awesome, I loved Lucy's accent. <3 you guys.
Vacation next week. well, the end of it anyway, the 21st I think we're leaving.
Steve's a dork. But I love him.
I hate feet.
I missed Val. I'm glad we're hanging out again.
ok. that's all I guess. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 29th, 2005|12:53 pm] |
"I love you, but..."
The story of my life.
Come a little closer, baby
I feel like layin' you down
On a bed sweet surrender
Where we can work it all out
There ain't nothin' that love can't fix
Boy, it's right here at our fingertips
So come a little closer baby,
I feel like layin' you down
Come a little closer, baby
I feel like lettin' go
Of everything that stands between us
And the love we used to know
I wanna touch you like a cleansing rain
Let it wash all the hurt away
So come a little closer baby
I feel like lettin' go
If there's still a chance
Then take my hand
And we'll steal away
Off into the night
'till we make things right
The suns gonna rise on a better day
Come a little closer baby
I feel like strippin' it down
Back to the basics of you and me
What makes the world go round
Every inch of you against my skin
I wanna be stronger than we've ever been
So come a little closer baby
I feel like strippin' it down
Just a little bit closer baby
Just a little bit closer baby
Come a little bit closer baby
I feel like layin' you down |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 28th, 2005|12:37 pm] |
I'm waiting until after vacation to further pursue getting a car. So I have money to buy stuff while I'm there.
Kurt. Your poor, poor hand. You're not allowed to leave the house ever again. It's too dangerous. YOU'D BETTER GIVE YOUR PARENTS MY NUMBER IN CASE ANYTHING SERIOUS EVER DOES HAPPEN. You loser. It'd better not.
But, yeah. I feel horrible. My stomach won't stop turning. It's a very icky feeling. And even getting my new car tomorrow won't make it go away. That's how bad it is. Even if someone gave it to me for free, I'd still feel like this. THAT'S VERY BAD.
Holes. Don't dig them. |
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